Quick Answer: To elope means to get married in a private or low-key way, usually without a large traditional wedding. Dictionaries define it as running away secretly to marry, often without parental approval — but today, most couples who "elope" plan the day openly and simply choose a smaller, more personal wedding.
Key Takeaways
- Elope is a verb that means to marry privately, historically by running away in secret.
- Major dictionaries, including Merriam-Webster and Cambridge, still define elope around the idea of secrecy and parental disapproval.
- In everyday modern use, elope usually just means a small, intimate wedding — planned or unplanned, secret or not.
- The word forms are: elope, elopes, eloped, eloping, and the noun elopement.
- Eloping can result in a fully legal marriage as long as the couple meets their state's marriage requirements.
- Elope, elopement, and eloping all come from the same root verb but function differently in a sentence.
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What Does Elope Mean?
To elope means to get married privately, quietly, and usually without the size or formality of a traditional wedding.
Historically, the word was almost always tied to secrecy — a couple running off to marry without their family's knowledge or approval. That older meaning hasn't disappeared. But in day-to-day conversation, most people now use "elope" more loosely, to describe any small, low-key wedding, even one the couple planned for months and told their whole family about.
So when someone asks "what does elope mean," there are really two correct answers: the strict dictionary definition, and the way the word is actually used by engaged couples today. Both matter, so this guide covers each one.
What Is the Dictionary Definition of Elope?
Every major English dictionary defines elope around two consistent ideas: secrecy and marriage. Here's how the leading dictionaries phrase it.
| Dictionary | Core Definition |
|---|---|
| Merriam-Webster | To run away secretly with the intention of getting married, usually without parental consent. Encyclopedia Britannica |
| Cambridge Dictionary | To leave home secretly in order to get married without the permission of your parents. |
| Collins English Dictionary | To run away secretly with a lover, especially in order to marry. |
| Britannica Dictionary | To run away secretly to get married. |
| American Heritage Dictionary | To run away with a lover, especially with the intention of getting married. |
Notice the pattern: every dictionary definition centers on running away, secrecy, and marriage — not on wedding size, style, or budget. That's the formal, literal meaning of the word.
Merriam-Webster's fuller entry also notes a second, less common sense: to run away from one's spouse with a lover. This older usage isn't about weddings at all — it refers to abandoning a marriage for someone else. It's rarely used this way today, but it explains why some older or literary texts use "elope" without any wedding context. Encyclopedia Britannica
In plain English: if you strip away the formal wording, every dictionary is really just saying the same thing — elope means to get married quietly, without your family's involvement or approval, often by leaving home to do it.
Is Elope a Verb? Word Forms and Grammar
Yes. Elope is an intransitive verb, which means it doesn't take a direct object — you don't "elope someone," you simply "elope."
| Form | Type | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Elope | Base verb | "They want to elope next spring." |
| Elopes | Third-person singular | "She elopes with her college sweetheart." |
| Eloped | Past tense | "They eloped last June." |
| Eloping | Present participle | "We are eloping in October." |
| Elopement | Noun | "Their elopement was small and simple." |
A few grammar notes worth knowing:
- "Getting eloped" is not standard English. Because elope is intransitive, the correct phrasing is "we eloped," "we are eloping," or "we got married by eloping" — not "we got eloped."
- Elopement is the noun form and refers to the event itself ("Their elopement took place at sunrise").
- Elope is never used as an adjective or adverb.
Where Does the Word Elope Come From?
The word elope has a longer history than most people expect, and marriage wasn't originally part of its meaning at all.
Etymologists trace it to the Anglo-Norman word aloper, meaning to abduct or run away, which likely combined an Old French prefix meaning "out" or "away" with a root related to running or leaping. Some sources also connect it to the Middle Dutch word lopen, meaning "run away." Cambridge DictionaryLongman
By the late 1500s, English speakers had narrowed the meaning specifically to couples running away together to marry — usually against a family's wishes. That's the sense that stuck, and it's still the core dictionary definition more than 400 years later.
Elope: Traditional Meaning vs. Modern Meaning
The literal dictionary definition hasn't changed much, but the way real couples use and understand the word has shifted a lot, especially over the last decade.
| Traditional Meaning | Modern, Everyday Meaning | |
|---|---|---|
| Secrecy | Required — family didn't know | Optional — many couples tell everyone in advance |
| Approval | Usually done without parental consent | Family approval is often not a factor at all |
| Planning | Sudden, unplanned, urgent | Often planned for months, sometimes with a photographer and officiant booked |
| Guests | None | Can include a few close family members or friends |
| Motivation | Escaping family disapproval or social rules | Wanting privacy, lower cost, or a more personal ceremony |
| Location | Often somewhere quick and convenient | Can be a courthouse, beach, mountain, or destination |
This is the gap that trips a lot of people up: a dictionary will tell you elope means secret and unapproved, while a wedding blog will tell you it just means small and intimate. Both are accurate — one reflects the word's formal definition, the other reflects modern usage.
If you're researching this for wedding planning rather than word study, our elopement meaning guide breaks down exactly how modern elopements work in practice, including what they typically include.
Elope vs. Elopement vs. Eloping
These three words come from the same root but aren't interchangeable in a sentence.
- Elope is the verb: "We decided to elope."
- Eloping is the present participle, used for ongoing or future action: "We are eloping in the fall."
- Elopement is the noun, used to describe the event or concept: "Our elopement was in the mountains."
A simple way to remember it: if the word follows "to," "we," "they," or "I," you likely need elope or eloped. If it follows "an," "the," or "our," you likely need elopement.
For a deeper look at how the meaning of elopement specifically (the noun and the event) has evolved, see Elope Meaning: What Does It Mean to Elope?
What Does Elope Mean in a Sentence?
Seeing the word in context often makes the meaning clearer than a definition alone.
- "They eloped at a courthouse with only a judge and one witness."
- "We're thinking about eloping instead of planning a 150-guest wedding."
- "Her parents didn't find out she'd eloped until after the ceremony."
- "The couple eloped to Colorado and got married on a mountain trail."
- "He eloped with his high school girlfriend against his family's wishes."
Notice that some of these examples involve secrecy (the older meaning) and some don't (the modern meaning). Both usages are considered correct today.
Is Eloping Legally Binding?
Yes. Eloping produces a fully legal marriage as long as the couple meets the marriage requirements of the place where they marry. The word "elope" describes the style and size of the wedding — not a separate or lesser legal category of marriage.
To make an elopement legally valid in the United States, couples generally need to:
- Obtain a valid marriage license from the correct county or state office
- Marry within that license's valid window
- Use an officiant who is legally authorized to perform marriages
- Meet any witness requirements, which vary by state
Because these rules differ from state to state, couples should confirm current requirements with their local county clerk before the ceremony.
Why Do People Choose to Elope?
Common reasons couples give for eloping include:
- Privacy — avoiding a large audience during vows
- Lower cost — fewer guests generally means lower catering, venue, and rental costs
- Less stress — fewer logistics to manage on the wedding day
- Family conflict — avoiding disagreements over guest lists or planning decisions
- Freedom of location — the ability to marry almost anywhere, including outdoor or destination settings
None of these reasons require secrecy. This is the clearest sign of how far the word's everyday meaning has drifted from its dictionary roots.
Elope vs. Get Married vs. Run Away
Because "elope" overlaps with a few related phrases, it helps to see them side by side.
| Term | Meaning |
|---|---|
| Elope | Marry privately or secretly, often by leaving home |
| Get married | General term for entering into marriage, any size or style |
| Run away | Leave home or a situation; doesn't necessarily involve marriage |
| Marry in secret | Similar to elope, but "elope" always implies leaving somewhere to do it |
Every elopement involves getting married, but not every wedding is an elopement — and not everyone who runs away is eloping.
Common Mistakes With the Word "Elope"
- Saying "getting eloped." Standard English uses "we eloped" or "we are eloping," not "getting eloped."
- Assuming elope always means secret. True by dictionary definition, but not always true in modern, everyday usage.
- Assuming eloping means no guests at all. Many modern elopements include a handful of close family members.
- Thinking an elopement isn't a "real" legal marriage. An elopement is legally identical to any other marriage once the license and ceremony requirements are met.
Synonyms and Related Words for Elope
Words and phrases people often use in place of or alongside "elope" include: marry secretly, run off to marry, marry privately, small wedding, intimate wedding, courthouse wedding, private ceremony, and marry without a big wedding.
Expert Tip: If you're planning your own wedding and searching "what does elope mean," you're likely trying to decide whether an elopement fits your relationship, not just the dictionary. Before committing to the word, it can help to think about what you actually want: privacy, a small guest list, a lower budget, or a specific location. The word itself is flexible — your version of eloping doesn't have to match the historical definition.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does elope mean?
To elope means to get married privately, usually without a large traditional wedding. The dictionary definition centers on secretly running away to marry, though the word is often used more loosely today.
Is elope a verb?
Yes. Elope is an intransitive verb with the forms elope, elopes, eloped, and eloping. The related noun is elopement.
What does eloped mean?
Eloped is the past tense of elope. It describes a marriage that has already happened through an elopement, as in "They eloped last year."
Does eloping always mean getting married in secret?
By strict dictionary definition, yes. In everyday modern use, no — many couples plan their elopement openly and tell family and friends in advance.
Is "getting eloped" correct grammar?
No. Because elope is intransitive, the standard phrasing is "we eloped," "we are eloping," or "we got married by eloping."
Are you legally married if you elope?
Yes, as long as you meet your state or country's marriage requirements, including a valid marriage license and an authorized officiant.
What is the difference between elope and elopement?
Elope is the verb ("they eloped"). Elopement is the noun that names the event or the concept ("their elopement was small").
Where does the word elope come from?
It comes from the Anglo-Norman word aloper, meaning to run away or abduct, with roots also connected to Middle Dutch words for running.
Can you elope with guests present?
Yes. Modern elopements often include a small number of close family members or friends, even though the traditional definition implies just the couple.
Final Thoughts
At its core, elope means to marry privately — historically by running away in secret, and today, often just by choosing a smaller, more personal wedding. The dictionary definition hasn't budged much in 400 years, but the way couples actually use the word has become far more flexible. Whether you're researching the term out of curiosity or because you're planning your own wedding, understanding both meanings — the formal one and the modern one — gives you the full picture.
If you're weighing whether eloping is right for your own wedding, our complete elopement meaning guide walks through how modern elopements work, what they typically cost, and how to start planning one.
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